dealing with low YouTube views

Sigh. My views are REALLY low these days. It's definitely tough to deal with. 

I am constantly reminded of the tennis mindset. If you win a game, even when you are ranked world #1, you only win a bit over 50% of your points. When you lose a point, all you can do is focus on the next point. Play that next point as well as you can. 

I've been practicing that mindset over time. I'm not the strongest person, but I know I am capable of going through enormous levels of pain to get to my goals. I know that sounds dramatic. Enormous levels of pain? From just making videos?

It really has been painful, oddly enough. In addition to physical pain, this is how it feels inside my head: It takes many hours for anyone to film and edit a video. And then, you upload. It feels like sending a risky text or letter into the unknown to someone who you've never met. You forget, momentarily, all the friends who would actually love to see the video. Then you see the numbers come in, and nearly every time, they are a big disappointment. You have to separate the results from the process. It's easy enough to do this for one year, but can I do this for five? I don't know if I can keep believing in myself. I feel foolish for doing this.

I’ve been told many times that my videos have helped people. That makes it worth it to me, so I'm not going to stop, because I still love editing videos. I just do, and I can't describe why. Every minute and hour in front of Final Cut Pro feels like the best feeling. If that's what my passion is, then I'm going to keep improving it. I'm going to get as many proverbial tennis grand slams as I can, not in trophies but in lives touched. 

Okay, I'm going to stop ranting now. See you in the next Sunday YouTube upload.

𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮 𝓯𝓻𝓸𝓶 𝓳𝓪𝓷𝓮 ૮꒰˶ᵔ ᗜ ᵔ˶꒱ა

P.S. If you want to hear more than just what I've been working on or thinking about at a surface level, I share deeper and more personal stories on Patreon.