YouTube update January 2026

After about half a year, I'm finally back to the original subscriber count (~3,635) I had summer of 2025. After making a lot of vlogs since the summer of 2025 my subscribe count went down to around 3,601 or so at its lowest point. 

It was hard to see, but I really wanted to create a library of vlogs. Making vlogs isn't my end goal exactly, but the ability to make them provides a lot of flexibility for video content in the future, because if the channel is topic agnostic, meaning I can connect with my subscribers regardless of topic, then I will have much more freedom later.

After a while I no longer wanted to make only vlogs, and felt open to mixing vlogs with specific topics. This is when my subscriber count slowly crawled back to where it was before. It was simply a matter of making searchable videos instead of vlogs. I also uploaded more often in January 2026 which helped a bit with impressions. But overall I think the baseline impressions are due to recent searchable videos.

The number of videos is still very small as far as YouTube channels go. I'm at about 71 public videos, but already seeing the benefits because there is more to explore (per topic) if someone finds the channel.

Because I have made such few videos in total I feel like I am still at the very beginning of the journey.

The comments have been almost entirely positive, with most videos receiving 100% likes and a few receiving close to 100%. The few comment that aren't positive are just rude or mean, usually due to someone projecting their own thoughts onto me and not watching key parts of the video that would have clarified their questions.

I'm glad my videos and impressions are due to my library now, rather than one or two spike-y popular videos. It feels like I'm growing in a more sustainable way. My viewers (distinct views) have slowly grown past 2,000, which is not something I had before unless there was one video doing exceptionally well (micro-viral, I'll call it).

I'll continue working hard and just have to keep focusing on the next one.

𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮 𝓯𝓻𝓸𝓶 𝓳𝓪𝓷𝓮 ૮꒰˶ᵔ ᗜ ᵔ˶꒱ა

YouTube update

It's hard to believe all the different videos we did this year, from fixing GameCubes to waiting outside Nintendo New York to fixing watches and talking about handbags, exploring New York and Florida and running into a couple of protests.

This second year of YouTube, in 2026, I have to admit that I need to scale the channel. And the only way to do that is to build upon the videos I've already made and make videos with very specific topics that are safe for the algorithm to bring to audience members. Given the massive scale of YouTube and the relatively straightforward algorithm, and the optimization that requires as much time on the platform as possible, "safe" videos with clear topics usually win for small channels like mine. I don't think I have to do anything crazy but I also need to be slightly more strategic instead of just making completely random videos on random topics on a whim. I also want to make more videos, faster, but as someone who can't stand to have a fixed routine, that's not the first thing on my mind.

A few updates for Patreon & YouTube members: We have a little Discord server now! If you have trouble getting into the server, the link is probably broken again. You can just contact me with your Discord username and I'll message you on Discord with a link that will work.

Talk to you soon. If you'd like to see more posts from me, join us on Patreon, which will also include Discord access.

𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮 𝓯𝓻𝓸𝓶 𝓳𝓪𝓷𝓮 ૮꒰˶ᵔ ᗜ ᵔ˶꒱ა

I'm currently listening to: Viva Forever - Spice Girls

dealing with low YouTube views

Sigh. My views are REALLY low these days. It's definitely tough to deal with. 

I am constantly reminded of the tennis mindset. If you win a game, even when you are ranked world #1, you only win a bit over 50% of your points. When you lose a point, all you can do is focus on the next point. Play that next point as well as you can. 

I've been practicing that mindset over time. I'm not the strongest person, but I know I am capable of going through enormous levels of pain to get to my goals. I know that sounds dramatic. Enormous levels of pain? From just making videos?

It really has been painful, oddly enough. In addition to physical pain, this is how it feels inside my head: It takes many hours for anyone to film and edit a video. And then, you upload. It feels like sending a risky text or letter into the unknown to someone who you've never met. You forget, momentarily, all the friends who would actually love to see the video. Then you see the numbers come in, and nearly every time, they are a big disappointment. You have to separate the results from the process. It's easy enough to do this for one year, but can I do this for five? I don't know if I can keep believing in myself. I feel foolish for doing this.

I’ve been told many times that my videos have helped people. That makes it worth it to me, so I'm not going to stop, because I still love editing videos. I just do, and I can't describe why. Every minute and hour in front of Final Cut Pro feels like the best feeling. If that's what my passion is, then I'm going to keep improving it. I'm going to get as many proverbial tennis grand slams as I can, not in trophies but in lives touched. 

Okay, I'm going to stop ranting now. See you in the next Sunday YouTube upload.

𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮 𝓯𝓻𝓸𝓶 𝓳𝓪𝓷𝓮 ૮꒰˶ᵔ ᗜ ᵔ˶꒱ა

P.S. If you want to hear more than just what I've been working on or thinking about at a surface level, I share deeper and more personal stories on Patreon.

what i’ve learned after 1.5 years of editing youtube videos

I’ve been editing YouTube videos for about a year and a half now, and it’s still my favorite thing to do. I love it. It doesn’t feel like real work to me. Some parts get monotonous, sure, but I don’t mind — I just take a break and come back. Every time, I love how it makes me feel.

Lately, I’ve been learning how to make you feel something too — to connect more deeply with what you see and hear. My edits now lean more on emotion and storytelling than on counting how many exact seconds a clip should last. I feel more while I edit, and it seems to come through. Some subscribers have even told me they’ve cried (the good kind of cry) watching my videos. If I’m doing this right, maybe more of you will cry too (in good ways, I hope).

I’m excited to keep going. The next video will be up on Sunday, October 5 — I hope you enjoy it.

P.S. I asked the community whether they’d like to see flowers or animals. For a while it was close, about 50/50, but flowers won by a small margin. I’m glad people voted. And since there was strong interest in animals, we’ll see them the following week if all goes well.

₊˚⊹ ᰔ˖ ⊹ ࣪ ౨ৎ˚₊ i <3 u ꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱₊⁺⊹⋆₊˚⊹ᰔ

YouTube update

I'm getting into a better rhythm with YouTube. My vlogs have been getting higher like:view ratios than other videos. However, vlogs usually get the lowest views (and impressions) so I will try to bake in some SEO into the timestamps or video descriptions and cross my fingers. I'm still getting low views but I'd like to build a library of vlogs because they are well-received, and I really enjoy making them and hearing what people think or how they make people feel (all positive so far, thankfully!).

I'm hoping to post on a more regular schedule. I will be scheduling videos to go out on Sundays at noon Eastern time. If I make a video before Sunday, I'll just schedule it for later. If I have a lot of videos in the queue then you might see bonus videos going out on Wednesday. But I don't want to overcommit, so my primary focus is Sundays. 

I've always wanted to post on Sundays because I think those days can be lonely sometimes. Monday through Thursday, most people are working. Friday they're winding down. Saturday they're out with friends. Sunday, they come home and get ready for Monday, and sometimes Monday is just annoying to deal with. I hope by posting on Sundays, somehow the upcoming Monday won't seem as bad.

I hope to Twitch stream again because it is really fun. But only if I feel that I'm ahead on making YouTube videos. I see it as an extra reward! I just started playing Oblivion -- the original one. It feels like a really great game. Full of great music, a great plot, etc. It just seems to have the meat and potatoes. I've never felt the same way about a video game before. It's a bit scary for me because I'm more used to games like Pokemon or Hello Kitty Island Adventure but I'm pushing through. 

Well, I look forward to seeing you on YouTube this Sunday. I hope you enjoy it. Whether you do or not, I'd love to hear your feedback.

Extra special thank you to the channel's first ever Patreon member and YouTube members. If you are enjoying my work and would be open to supporting me, I'd be thrilled to see you there!

I'm doing YouTube full-time right now and will continue working hard to make good and comforting videos for you.

𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮 𝓯𝓻𝓸𝓶 𝓳𝓪𝓷𝓮 ૮꒰˶ᵔ ᗜ ᵔ˶꒱ა

My YouTube Plan

I am working on combining my technical skills, storytelling, deadpan humor, and artistic shots into one type of video. My goal is to create a new type of video format no one has ever seen before, combining the technique of film with the intimacy of speaking to only one person, layered with both seriousness and humor.

Previously I wanted to explore every topic possible, and try every format possible, and explore the extent of my creative range. 

As time goes on the videos will probably be more “consistent” and able to “snowball” a bit better. I loved making a documentary but it was too impersonal. I loved making post ironic comedy but it was too unserious. I loved making introspective vlogs but it was too focused on me. I loved doing vintage restorations but it was too technical. I want to combine pieces of those aspects into something stronger. Something that can stand in an even better place because it used the best of every previous video.

If I had stayed with handbag or watch videos the channel would have snowballed by topic. But I wanted to create something new and have the freedom to explore any topic.

Still, I am very scared. I feel like a bit of a fool making these obscure videos and stare at the numbers too much!

Please let me know what you think of the next video.

The first week of having a flip phone

The first week of having a flip phone has been amazing. I have so much more time now. Almost too much time. I get everything I wanted to get done and more. I have so much less chatter in my head about how horrible I am. I still have it but there's less time spent on that and more time doing what I need to get done.

I want to become a really great video editor.

𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮 𝓯𝓻𝓸𝓶 𝓳𝓪𝓷𝓮 ૮꒰˶ᵔ ᗜ ᵔ˶꒱ა

first few days using a flip phone

{ these are journal entries from my flip phone}

i got a kyocera digno 920kc in pink. it's been life-changing. here is how i felt the first few days, starting with july 1, 2025.

day 1 🦄d=(^o^)=b🦄
wow. i really like this phone! i feel like the loud thoughts in my head are quieter now. my smartphone gave my brain too many ideas to process in a short period of time. i'm looking forward to getting texts to work on this too.

day 2 has been amazing. i enjoyed texting my husband when out and not getting into instagram scrolling. next i want to text without looking at the keys and use my iphone less

day 3 🏖️ has been great too. i'm getting faster at typing without looking and really enjoying waking up to texts instead of the internet. also the battery seems amazing from normal use. i'm trying to figure out which devices to use when and realized my ipad has mostly been unused lately.

The first 10 weeks of self-employment

It’s been two and a half months since I left my corporate career, and somehow it feels like much longer.

My problems didn’t magically disappear, but removing myself from environments where people were toxic or unethical has made a huge difference. It’s helped me draw stronger boundaries in every part of my life. I’ve kept standing up for myself, and I no longer feel the need to make everyone overly comfortable the way I often did in my twenties—which, ironically, doesn’t help anyone in the long run. Making decisions that benefit everyone in the long run usually means disappointing, angering, or confusing people in the short term. I’ve been learning to sit with that discomfort and trust my instincts.

I haven’t been editing videos as quickly as I’d like, but I’ve managed to keep up a steady rhythm of uploads and stay connected to my passion for storytelling. More and more people have commented on my editing, which feels like real progress. Editing takes hundreds—sometimes thousands—of decisions, plus some studying, some experimenting, and working within whatever constraints the software and format give me. But it continues to fascinate me. I love finding ways to reflect ideas both visually and audibly.

Pacing has been a huge part of that. Just like an orchestra speeds up or slows down, a video needs the right timing, too. But that only makes sense to me once I know what kind of “music” or emotional tone each part of the video should carry, and how those parts fit into the whole. I actually can’t begin editing without choosing the music first. Once I hear how each part feels, my brain tells me exactly how it’ll look. That’s when I’m ready to edit.

I've also been spending some time on eBay and my online store, but instead of letting it take over, I’ve kept it to a slower, as-needed rhythm. Putting some boundaries around that time has done a lot for my overall happiness. Those projects bring in some income, but they’re just a few of the income streams I want to establish for the long term.

A new idea I’ve been thinking about: livestreaming. I saw someone do that on a Chinese TV show a while back—just chatting on their phone, live—and for some reason, I liked the idea of it. It feels more natural to me than streaming video games, and maybe a little easier because we're not forced to talk about a certain game. I’d like to try broadcasting to Twitch and YouTube at the same time. If we try that, I’d love to see you there.

I installed Linux on my old Macbook Pro.

I have a 2017 15" MacBook Pro in my house. The battery's dying, the keyboard is a bit broken (t’s often turn into tt’s), and it wouldn’t even connect to Wi-Fi until I finally fixed it yesterday.

Then I had the bright idea to install Ubuntu 24.04 LTS (Linux) on it, since macOS runs painfully slow on this old machine. After about five hours of troubleshooting, I came to the frustrating conclusion: the version of Ubuntu I wanted to use just doesn’t play nice with this MacBook’s Wi-Fi hardware. I’d need to buy a $30 wireless adapter to get reliable internet. Ughhhh…

I don’t regret trying all of that, but I was definitely not having fun for most of it. I managed to get Wi-Fi working on one type of Ubuntu desktop environment (GNOME), but not the one that lets me install a Windows XP theme (XFCE). So I had to choose: working internet or retro aesthetic. At one point, I broke Wi-Fi completely. It wasn’t even an option anymore — and had to fix it all over again. The last 24 hours of my life (when at home) has involved endless Terminal commands, going in circles with half-working, half-outdated instructions online.

What’s next? I have got a MacBook Air from maybe 2011 sitting in Florida. That one might be a better Linux candidate. Apparently, it uses different Wi-Fi hardware that should “just work” with Linux. It also doesn’t have the awful butterfly keyboard, has backlit keys, and retro in a way I love. If I can get that old computer running smoothly on Linux, that’ll be great.

I was going to say I can’t wait to try it out, but Linux made me sleepy.

Listening: Pressure Machine - The Killers

𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮 𝓯𝓻𝓸𝓶 𝓳𝓪𝓷𝓮 ૮꒰˶ᵔ ᗜ ᵔ˶꒱ა